Plan A(wful)? Plan B(ad)? Plan C(rud)?..... Plan T(rust).

Don't we all love planners? The people who have their next month of meals posted on the refrigerator door, color coded family calendars, and fabulous places to go and things to do. I feel about plans like I do about running. My brain tells me I am a runner, but my body does not seem to have the same idea. In my head I have all sorts of great plans but sometimes they don't materialize they way I had envisioned them. Today I am going to talk a few circles around plans. Bear with me.

I think that the gift of being a "planner" might be a human characteristic that God came up with at least a little bit for his own amusement. He even mentions it in His book (many times). Proverbs 19:21 says it my favorite way: 

"A person may have many plans in their heart. But the Lord's purpose wins out in the end."

Haha human, have fun with those plans! I wrestle with this concept that God gave me a brain and this ability to organize things and make plans and yet, He's going to do what He's going to do regardless of me. Then, I take a closer look at the words of that scripture- many are peoples' PLANS (plural) but God has a PURPOSE (singular). Big. Difference. That tension of my plans and God's purpose is intentional. It is what keeps me on my toes. Plans are not bad, I just must not get so bogged down by my plans that I lose sight if His purpose.

Speaking of plans, here is an interesting thought on 'plans' and my current situation: Over the course of the next several moths there is a definite plan for how I need to proceed and it is largely determined by someone other than me (doctor). Ok, I will sit back and let someone else be my personal planner for now- seems like an ok idea. But, there isn't anyone making a plan for how my kids are supposed to go through this, or my husband. This is backwards. Since when is there a plan for me and not for the rest of them? My plan might include some unpleasant elements, but at least it is organized and well thought out. 

There is no guidebook for how to tell your 9 and 12 year old that their mom has cancer, that the summer is going to look a little different than we all thought it would. Those words taste foul in your mouth. What about the loving husband and dad who not only does his job all day, but is now looking at a summer full of doing MY jobs too. Ugh. This is not a good plan. Normally I am the one who makes the plans for them and those plans usually include things that make their lives better, not worse!

Many of you want to know what I need, how you can be helpful. My own personal needs are pretty minimal. My greatest "need" is to know that my husband and kids are getting the encouragement and care that they need during this time. My Brent, my Blake, my Paige. As different as can be from one another and yet they are my people! Brent likes movies, golf, and words of encouragement. Blake likes to interact with people while working with them (doesn't hurt if they have a dirt bike too). Paige, sweet Paige, is painfully social- loves conversation, crafts, and people. Having a tired mommy for the past week has been a huge bummer for her! 

So, sweet friends, as you continue to lift our family in prayer "plan" is a theme. Obviously, healing is part of the prayer and we can pray for Doctor Hsu and his team who are currently the orchestrators of that plan. More importantly though, for this wife and mama's heart, I covet your prayers for the plans that will be unfolding for Brent and Blake and Paige. Some of you are able to participate, physically, in those plans and I thank you in advance for that. 

Until next time, I PLAN to keep taking this thing one day at a time and today that includes a whole lot of laundry and getting everyone packed for camp next week. Sounds like a good plan to me! Praying for you to find peace in your plans for today and that God's purpose would be evident in all of us.